I hate this ship. [ just. flatly. ] I hate everything about those three words.
[ and other things he hates is the very sudden memory rift that opens! there's an irritated noise from shoma that's basically "not again!" before luke is thrown into something (58:55, or basically the end of the video. i'm sorry it's so long. )
for your reference this memory will be seen in a little bit of a fuzzy manner in that a.) the girl in the white cloak doesn't have a clear face/luke cannot see what she looks like, b.) the dialogue from tama and aiba cannot be heard, and c.) there are parts where they're just examining the house that you don't have to pay attention to/moments where mizuki is talking to ryuki/date that aren't important and you can ignore. yeehaw. ]
[WHY IS THIS VIDEO SIMULTANEOUSLY SO SERIOUS AND SO FUNNY THE CLOSET OPENING TOOK MY ASS OUT
Fortunately Luke does not have the same reaction--as the memory ends, he lifts a hand to rub lightly at his head, processing everything he just saw; he keeps his own reaction schooled for now, though, glancing over at Shoma to gauge how he feels.]
[ because it's the same vibe as iris "i'm a cute internet idol but also i have a brain tumor and i'm gonna die soon lol" sagan honestly, that's the aisom experience.
ANYWAY. thanks luke. shoma is just...the vibe is tired, really, because this isn't the first time he's seen this memory (it's also not even the first time he's seen it again this week, damn) but he's also not sure what to say.
so he thinks back to one of his first conversations with luke and he settles for a little shrug. ]
...like I said, I'm figuring stuff out. It's just going to take a little time.
[ he's...aware he has to tell luke some very key defining things about himself now that he's asking questions, but he's waiting to see what, exactly, he asks. ]
She's been at the detention center for about a week now. She said that her lawyer thinks they might be able to get a lighter sentence for her, considering the nature of things, but...it's still early.
[ so uh. she's alive and fine but also arrested and being charged for murder, so. ]
...I've gone to see her every day since then, but we don't get to talk that much. She's always crying, and it's still hard to talk about. [ and he doesn't feel like pressing her when this whole thing has traumatized both of them. ]
Mm. [...] If you were in my world, I'd be able to put you in touch with the best lawyer there is.
[Granted unfortunately she would not get his sister off scot-free for murder,,, BUT STILL
He opens his mouth like he wants to say something else, but then Shoma gets hit with a memory of Luke's, which is not the one I was going to give you but it was too funny not to after this.]
[ he doesn't get to comment on the lawyer thing because. well. this happens. and he's not sure if he even wants to believe luke about that suddenly.
he's quiet for a moment as if contemplating what he wants to actually say about this. it's...well. it is and isn't surprising. it is because luke in general seems like a perfectly normal and nice person. it isn't because detective (cops, etc.) always do what they have to do to solve their cases and get their way, even when they don't want other people to see it or get involved.
and there's a stray, floating thought of immortality ritual...? ]
...did you get your answers from him? Or did you kill him?
[Thinks about how Luke is the dictionary definition of the exact type of person that Kazuki hates and laughs into my wine glass
Anyway. Well. As the memory ends, Luke looks distinctly unhappy--between being a lifelong liar and a, y'know, SECRET agent--he does so hate this effect in particular. This side of himself, especially, is not one that he ever wants the vast majority of people to see--especially not the people he wants to protect. "I'll always be the person you like when I'm with you," he'd told Rosa--but even if she'd been understanding, he still worries that she's never looked at him the same way since.
Luke is fairly good at keeping his emotions locked up, even when the variety of weekly effects active. What leaks from him now isn't quite guilt or shame, not after so many people have been exposed to him like this, but more... resignation. An understanding that from this point on, their relationship is different--and a touch of sadness, for the shattered illusion on both ends.]
I didn't. He's in prison in a different country now. [And Luke isn't really in the habit of defending himself, because he believes in what he does, but. He's not so insensitive that he doesn't understand how this might feel to Shoma after what he saw, so... after a contemplative pause--] ...Part of the reason I was so aggressive with him is that the son of someone he'd murdered was on the island was hunting him down. I needed him to get moving quickly, before that person caught up to us.
shoma, for the most part, seems quiet as he considers these things. it's a lot to process, and it's a lot to really accept knowing this is just how luke is. two sides of the same person, someone who does what he has to to get results without consequence.
it's hard to say what his feelings are because his emotional feedback is also pretty quiet, but it's clear he is thinking a lot of things judging by the way he's staring at him without breaking eye contact. ]
You don't really have to justify it, Luke. [ evenly. ] If that other person caught him before you did, you'd be losing valuable information and time. Right? [ ... ] But I can tell that wasn't your first time doing something like this either.
More than that, it would have made the situation far more dangerous. [Even a serial killer has the right to a trial... and Rosa was... He pulls back his thoughts and feelings then, though, as if locking them behind an iron door. There's another pause, but then he nods slightly. He could lie, but Shoma was just in his head--Luke knows his thoughts weren't those of a scared new trainee.]
Fortunately, not often. [...] I wish I could say never.
[Not that he feels particularly bad about being an asshole to a much worse asshole, but he'd also love it if his job wasn't necessary and he could just do photo restorations or track down old ladies' lost puppies]
Not all killers do. [ he answers the unspoken thought without really meaning to. no. no, he is not going to agree all serial killers have a right to a trial, but that's him being a bitch and biased. nevertheless. ]
...who is she to you? [ he has a lot of other questions, but he's taking it a step at a time, and he thinks rosa must be important if luke cares that much about how she may see him and keeping her safe. ]
[Luke... does not argue with this because tbh he agrees deep in his heart... but unfortunately he can't support vigilante justice either. Sometimes you recognize that some people are shitstains and that there are lots of flaws in the system, but you also know that you can't just let people do whatever they want. (Sometimes you accidentally get wrapped up in a transnational case and recruited at 16 so your perspective is heavily skewed.)
He lets it pass in favor of focusing on the question--and although Luke is a very good actor, he doesn't try to school his features now. His expression softens, and though he turns his gaze away, the gentle fondness in his voice is unmistakable.]
...We grew up together. Her family took me in when I was a kid. [It's more than that, of course, it always has been--but even though he's being relatively open, he doesn't go into detail.] She's a very good person. One of the best I've ever known.
[ he will let it pass to focus on the other part, too. this is a little more important, and he's watching luke's expression and reading through his emotions to see how it all adds up. ]
...you did look like you knew each other pretty well. [ childhood friends to lovers...? he does not say this, but he kind of vaguely wonders. ] It's hard not to care about people you know for that long. Even harder not to think they're a good person when they've been around and have supported you that long, too. [ ... ] Does she always go with you for these things?
No. [Immediately!! He actually looks--not upset, exactly, but unhappy.] I told her not to come with me, but she insisted.
[And... he'd figured he could at least make sure she was protected if she was with him, so he'd eventually relented--but he still regrets it, knowing that it led to her seeing him that way.]
You managed to keep her safe. [ said more like a statement even if it's a question. like maybe in doing so, revealing the true nature of what luke's had to do isn't the worst outcome. ]
No, she's usually pretty good about staying uninvolved. This case was an exception. [SHOCKINGLY. Though it's more because she respects that his work is meant to be classified than anything else... and he doesn't comment on what she wants for his safety, because. Well. If he thinks about it too hard his heart will do all kinds of things, both good and bad, and he doesn't want that slipping past his emotional shields.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ and other things he hates is the very sudden memory rift that opens! there's an irritated noise from shoma that's basically "not again!" before luke is thrown into something (58:55, or basically the end of the video. i'm sorry it's so long. )
for your reference this memory will be seen in a little bit of a fuzzy manner in that a.) the girl in the white cloak doesn't have a clear face/luke cannot see what she looks like, b.) the dialogue from tama and aiba cannot be heard, and c.) there are parts where they're just examining the house that you don't have to pay attention to/moments where mizuki is talking to ryuki/date that aren't important and you can ignore. yeehaw. ]
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Fortunately Luke does not have the same reaction--as the memory ends, he lifts a hand to rub lightly at his head, processing everything he just saw; he keeps his own reaction schooled for now, though, glancing over at Shoma to gauge how he feels.]
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ANYWAY. thanks luke. shoma is just...the vibe is tired, really, because this isn't the first time he's seen this memory (it's also not even the first time he's seen it again this week, damn) but he's also not sure what to say.
so he thinks back to one of his first conversations with luke and he settles for a little shrug. ]
...like I said, I'm figuring stuff out. It's just going to take a little time.
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As for all of this--well. There's a distinct pause, like Luke is being very careful with what he says.]
How long ago was that? Your memory.
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Um...about a week before we got here.
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She's been at the detention center for about a week now. She said that her lawyer thinks they might be able to get a lighter sentence for her, considering the nature of things, but...it's still early.
[ so uh. she's alive and fine but also arrested and being charged for murder, so. ]
...I've gone to see her every day since then, but we don't get to talk that much. She's always crying, and it's still hard to talk about. [ and he doesn't feel like pressing her when this whole thing has traumatized both of them. ]
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[Granted unfortunately she would not get his sister off scot-free for murder,,, BUT STILL
He opens his mouth like he wants to say something else, but then Shoma gets hit with a memory of Luke's, which is not the one I was going to give you but it was too funny not to after this.]
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he's quiet for a moment as if contemplating what he wants to actually say about this. it's...well. it is and isn't surprising. it is because luke in general seems like a perfectly normal and nice person. it isn't because detective (cops, etc.) always do what they have to do to solve their cases and get their way, even when they don't want other people to see it or get involved.
and there's a stray, floating thought of immortality ritual...? ]
...did you get your answers from him? Or did you kill him?
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Anyway. Well. As the memory ends, Luke looks distinctly unhappy--between being a lifelong liar and a, y'know, SECRET agent--he does so hate this effect in particular. This side of himself, especially, is not one that he ever wants the vast majority of people to see--especially not the people he wants to protect. "I'll always be the person you like when I'm with you," he'd told Rosa--but even if she'd been understanding, he still worries that she's never looked at him the same way since.
Luke is fairly good at keeping his emotions locked up, even when the variety of weekly effects active. What leaks from him now isn't quite guilt or shame, not after so many people have been exposed to him like this, but more... resignation. An understanding that from this point on, their relationship is different--and a touch of sadness, for the shattered illusion on both ends.]
I didn't. He's in prison in a different country now. [And Luke isn't really in the habit of defending himself, because he believes in what he does, but. He's not so insensitive that he doesn't understand how this might feel to Shoma after what he saw, so... after a contemplative pause--] ...Part of the reason I was so aggressive with him is that the son of someone he'd murdered was on the island was hunting him down. I needed him to get moving quickly, before that person caught up to us.
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shoma, for the most part, seems quiet as he considers these things. it's a lot to process, and it's a lot to really accept knowing this is just how luke is. two sides of the same person, someone who does what he has to to get results without consequence.
it's hard to say what his feelings are because his emotional feedback is also pretty quiet, but it's clear he is thinking a lot of things judging by the way he's staring at him without breaking eye contact. ]
You don't really have to justify it, Luke. [ evenly. ] If that other person caught him before you did, you'd be losing valuable information and time. Right? [ ... ] But I can tell that wasn't your first time doing something like this either.
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More than that, it would have made the situation far more dangerous. [Even a serial killer has the right to a trial... and Rosa was... He pulls back his thoughts and feelings then, though, as if locking them behind an iron door. There's another pause, but then he nods slightly. He could lie, but Shoma was just in his head--Luke knows his thoughts weren't those of a scared new trainee.]
Fortunately, not often. [...] I wish I could say never.
[Not that he feels particularly bad about being an asshole to a much worse asshole, but he'd also love it if his job wasn't necessary and he could just do photo restorations or track down old ladies' lost puppies]
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Not all killers do. [ he answers the unspoken thought without really meaning to. no. no, he is not going to agree all serial killers have a right to a trial, but that's him being a bitch and biased. nevertheless. ]
...who is she to you? [ he has a lot of other questions, but he's taking it a step at a time, and he thinks rosa must be important if luke cares that much about how she may see him and keeping her safe. ]
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He lets it pass in favor of focusing on the question--and although Luke is a very good actor, he doesn't try to school his features now. His expression softens, and though he turns his gaze away, the gentle fondness in his voice is unmistakable.]
...We grew up together. Her family took me in when I was a kid. [It's more than that, of course, it always has been--but even though he's being relatively open, he doesn't go into detail.] She's a very good person. One of the best I've ever known.
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...you did look like you knew each other pretty well. [ childhood friends to lovers...? he does not say this, but he kind of vaguely wonders. ] It's hard not to care about people you know for that long. Even harder not to think they're a good person when they've been around and have supported you that long, too. [ ... ] Does she always go with you for these things?
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[And... he'd figured he could at least make sure she was protected if she was with him, so he'd eventually relented--but he still regrets it, knowing that it led to her seeing him that way.]
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You managed to keep her safe. [ said more like a statement even if it's a question. like maybe in doing so, revealing the true nature of what luke's had to do isn't the worst outcome. ]
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[There's a huge difference between normal city dangers and getting involved with tracking down serial killers, he thinks,,]
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...wait how long ago was that?
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Picks a random time]
Last summer.
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At least there's been a bit of a buffer between then and now. [ a little time for things to settle. ]